A Blast from the Past

Kids Say the Darndest Things

WHEN TO START CUSSING!

A 6-year-old and a 4-year-old are upstairs in their bedroom. 'You know what?' says the 6-year-old. 'I think it's about time we started cussing. The 4-year-old nods her head in approval. 

The 6-year-old continues, 'when we go downstairs for breakfast, I'm gonna say something with hell and you say something with a$$. The 4-year-old agrees with enthusiasm.

When the mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 6-year-old what she wants for breakfast, she replies, 'Aw, hell, Mom, I guess I'll have some Cheerios.'

WHACK! She flies out of her chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets up, and runs upstairs crying her eyes out, with her mother in hot pursuit, slapping her rear with every step. Her mom locks her in her room and shouts, 'You can stay there until I let you out!'

She then comes back downstairs, looks at the 4-year-old and asks with a stern voice, 'And what do YOU want for breakfast, young lady?

 ' I don't know', she blubbers, 'but you can bet your fat a$$ it won't be Cheerios!'

Image SOURCE: 

Kids Say the "Durness Things"

They keep you on your toes . . . Pay attention! 

A chuckle or two to end your weekend. 👇

TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America

MARIA: Here it is.

TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?

CLASS: Maria

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TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?

JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables. 

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TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'

GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'

TEACHER: No, that's wrong

GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it. ____________________________________________

TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?

DONALD: H I J K L M N O.

TEACHER: What are you talking about?

DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.

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TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.

WINNIE: Me!

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 TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?

GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

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TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?

LOUIS: Because George still had the ax in his hand. 

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TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?

SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook. 

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TEACHER: Clyde, your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?

CLYDE: No, teacher, it's the same dog.

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TEACHER: Mark, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?

Mark: A teacher

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Monday Night Humor

                             Computer Problems

Click Image to View Source

I was having trouble with my computer. So, I called Richard, the 11-year-old next door whose bedroom looks like a Mission Control Station and asked him to come over. Richard clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem.

As he was walking away, I called after him, 'So, what was wrong? He replied, 'It was an ID ten T error.'

I didn't want to appear stupid, but nonetheless I inquired, 'An, ID ten T error? What's that? In case I need to fix it again.' 

Richard grinned.... 'Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?' 

'No,' I replied. 'Write it down,' he said, 'and I think you'll figure it out.' 

So I wrote down: I D 1 0 T ...

I used to like that little farrt.............

Image Source Unknown

Didja gitta good laff OR NOT?!

Kids Say the Darndest Things

They Are Really Quick

A little girl goes to the barber shop with her father. She stands next to the barber chair eating a snack cake while her dad gets his hair cut.

The barber says to her, "Sweetheart, you're gonna get hair on your Twinkie."

She says, "Yes, I know, and I'm gonna get boobs too."

Happy Saturday Night Blog Friends!

Kids Say the Darndest Things

WHEN TO START CUSSING!

A 6 year old and a 4 year old are upstairs in their bedroom. 'You know what?' says the 6 year old. 'I think it's about time we started cussing. The 4 year old nods her head in approval. 

The 6 year old continues, 'when we go downstairs for breakfast, I'm gonna say something with hell and you say something with a$$. The 4 year old agrees with enthusiasm.

When the mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 6 year old what she wants for breakfast, she replies, 'Aw, hell, Mom, I guess I'll have some Cheerios.'

WHACK! She flies out of her chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets up, and runs upstairs crying her eyes out, with her mother in hot pursuit, slapping her rear end with every step. Her mom locks her in her room and shouts, 'You can stay there until I let you out!'

She then comes back downstairs, looks at the 4 year old and asks with a stern voice, 'And what do YOU want for breakfast, young lady?

' I don't know', she blubbers, 'but you can bet your fat a$$ it won't be Cheerios!'

Click image to view source

Wednesday Funnies

Johnny was at school and the teacher said, "Someone use fascinate in a sentence."

Sally answered, "The zoo was fascinating." The teacher said, "Sorry, Sally, I said to use fascinate in a sentence."

Maria suggested, "I was fascinated at the zoo." Once again the teacher said, "No, Maria, I specifically said to use fascinate in a sentence."

Johnny said, "My sister has ten buttons on her sweater." Again the teacher said, "Sorry, Johnny, I said use fascinate in a sentence."

Johnny replied, "I know, but her boobs are so big she can only fasten eight."

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A man drove his expensive car into a tree to find out how a Mercedes bends.

Q: Why does the queen carry a scepter?

A: Because everyone works 'cept her.

A tomato dad, mother, and son are walking in a street. The tomato son falls behind. The big father tomato walks back to the baby tomato, stomps on him, and yells, "Ketchup!"

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Good Night, Sleep Tight!

Click Images to View Source

Kids Humor

Kids Say the Darndest Things...

Computer Problems

I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Richard, the 11 year old next door whose bedroom looks like a Mission Control Center, and asked him to come over. Richard clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem.

As he was walking away, I called after him, 'So, what was wrong?

He replied, 'It was an ID ten T error.'

I didn't want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired, 'An, ID ten T error? What's that? In case I need to fix it again.'

Richard grinned.... 'Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?'

'No,' I replied. 'Write it down,' he said, 'and I think you'll figure it out.'

So I wrote down: I D 1 0 T ... 

I used to like the little farrt . . .



Click Images to view Source

Friday Funny Stuff

My Dad is a Father 

A little boy got on the bus, sat next to a man reading a book, and noticed he had his collar on backwards. The little boy asked why he wore his collar that way.

The man, who was a priest, said, "I am a Father."

The little boy replied, "My Daddy doesn't wear his collar like that."

The priest looked up from his book and answered "I am the Father of many."

The boy said, "My Dad has 4 boys, 4 girls and two grandchildren and he doesn't wear his collar that way."

The priest, getting impatient, said, "I am the Father of hundreds" and went back to reading his book.

The little boy sat quietly thinking for a while, then leaned over and said, "Maybe you should wear your pants backwards instead of your collar.”

I wasn't expecting THAT! Were you? Did you get a chuckle out of it? I hope so.

Happy Friday Everyone!

Priest Image Source: I don't know. I found this image waaaayy back when I first started Blogging...before I knew anything about Crediting sources. 

The AMAZING Jace, Creator & Master Designer

Zazzle Creations by Grandson, Jace!

Grandson Jace watched as I created designs and applied them to products on Zazzle. He wanted to do it too.

I had him open his MS Paint program, and he whipped out this design in less than 10 minutes...))): siiigghh.

It usually takes me a loooong time to complete a design.

KIDS, Go figure!!!

im a super star Baby Jersey Bodysuit

by dellgirl08

"im a super star" Baby Bib

by dellgirl08

Way-to-Go, Jace. You did an amazing job!

Saturday Night Laughs

Kids Are Quick.

You never know what will spill forth from their mouth!

                                                                                       

Image source

A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face.."

"Yes," the class said.

Image source

"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"

A little fellow shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty."

Image source

Image source

Have you heard any jaw-dropping kid-talk lately? Do you find the things kids say funny? Tell us about it. We'd love to hear all about it. 

Saturday Night Humor

Kids Say the Darndest Things!

Image source unknown

When questioned, elementary school children wrote the following statements about the Bible. The statements have not been edited. Incorrect spelling has been left in.

1. In the first book of the Bible, Guinessis, God got tired of creating the world, so he took the sabbath off.

2. Adam and Eve were created from an apple tree. Noah's wife was Joan of Ark. Noah built and ark and the animals came on in pears.

Source unknown

3. Lots wife was a pillar of salt during the day, but a ball of fire during the night.

4. The Jews were a proud people and throughout history they had trouble with unsympathetic genitals.

5. Sampson was a strongman who let himself be led astray by a Jezebel like Delilah.

6. Sampson slayed the Philistines with the axe of the apostles.

7. Moses led the Jews to the Red Sea where they were made unleavened bread which is bread without any ingredients.

8. The Egyptians were all drowned in the dessert. Afterwards, Moses went up to Mount Cyanide to get the Ten Commandments.

9. The first commandment was when Eve told Adam to eat the apple.

10. The seventh commandment is thou shalt not admit adultery. 

Click image to view source

What are your thoughts on kids humor and the bible? Have you noticed that kids are extremely funny? Let us hear from you in the comments section below. We'd love to hear from you. 

Lipstick in School

Some Things Are Learned Sooo Quickly!!!

Lipstick in School - Priceless! 

According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington was recently faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine but after they put on their lipstick, they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.

Every night the maintenance man would remove them, and the next day the girls would put them back.

Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man.

She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night (you can just imagine the yawns from the little princesses).

To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required.

He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it.

Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.

There are teachers and then there are educators!

Delta Children Table & Chair Set… Sesame Street – A Product Review

We call ours “the Elmo table” because the minute we got it, we saw that big beautiful picture of Elmo and fell head-over-heels in love!

After feeding my grandson in his high chair for months, we graduated to a booster seat so he could eat at the table with us. It didn't take long for us to realize that we should get a kiddie table just for him. My daughter found the perfect table, ordered it, and the rest is history.

We got the table. My grown baby son, grandson’s Uncle Mike, assembled it, then what?! My grandson uses the table for eating or coloring in his coloring books. 

It's perfect for playing games, painting with water colors and markers, and on and on…and into infinity.

There’s an added bonus. My daughter and I enjoy this table as much as my grandson does. We find ourselves pulling it over in front of us on the couch to put our laptops on or to do some writing, some paper cutting, and many other projects. It is a multi-purpose table that can be used for many things. The possibilities are endless.

Putting the table together was quick and easy. In fact it was so easy, even I could do it. But, I didn’t. Uncle Mike did it.

The table is made of solid wood so it is nice and durable. And, it is very strong and sturdy. Grown-ups have even sat on our table to chat for a minute. No problems, it remained steady.

This is a great buy for parents and grandparents who are looking for a table small enough for their child that is well built and durable. If you're wondering whether this is a good buy for you and your child or not, stop wondering! You cannot wrong with this table and chair set.

Pros: I love --
How easy the table and chairs are to put together
How strong and sturdy the set is
The finish on the top of the table and also on the chairs
The endless possibility of uses for this table and chair set

Cons:
- -No problems to report, I am 100% satisfied with this product.
- - You can find potential problems elsewhere, if that is what you are looking for.

Throw Yourself into Your Work

You must throw yourself into your work in order to be the best at what you do. If you are not fully passionate about what you are doing, your work will be drab and lackluster. If you want your work to stand out and be a cut above everyone else in your particular field, throw yourself into your work.

When you are fully engaged in your project, no matter what it is, your passion will shine through. Dive deep into your soul and find your inner child, let that inner child be the drive behind your desire. Throw yourself into your work and watch the difference in the work you produce.

You will be known all over the world as the pioneer of a new movement to throw yourself into yourself into your work.

My grandson, Jace, has paved the way for us. Trailblazer that he is, he shows us rather than try to tell us, exactly HOW to throw yourself into your work.

Here, he shares his technique for anyone who needs help learning how to throw yourself into your work.    

Do you know anyone who throws him/her self into their work? Have you ever thrown yourself into a project you were working on?

What do you think of Jace’s innovative idea of throwing himself into his ART work?

Freddie and Sebbie Kick Mats- Luxury Car Seat Back Protectors: A Product Review

Photo is mine

It has been all of thirty-five years, give or take a few years, since I had a small child in my care. So, I had no idea I needed Car Seat Back Covers until I started picking up my first and only grandson from school last year. When I pick him up from school every day, the first thing he does is to prop his feet up on the back of the seat in front of him.

For that reason, these seat back covers keep me from having to ask grandson to take his feet down off the seat.  These seat protectors are a sanity saver.  They are the perfect solution to protect my car seats from grandson’s wet, grimy, muddy, dirty and/or dusty shoes.

The seat covers take all of that dirty stuff. They take the wear and tear of the constant contact of his shoes. The cover keeps the back of the seat clean and scuff-free.

This car seat cover is a good fit for my car. It was really easy to install and it is equally as easy to remove it. My daughter, grandson’s mommy, installed it in a matter of minutes all by herself.

The greatest benefit of this seat cover is that it keeps me from having to clean the actual back of my car seat. This cover takes the beating while the back of the car seat remains in mint condition, like new.

Photo is mine

 Another good thing about the seat cover is that it is easy to clean. You can quickly wipe it clean with a damp towel or sponge in a matter of seconds.

This seat back cover is worth the money. I recommend it.

A Chuckle for the Day

The Fire Truck

A fireman is at the station house working outside on the fire truck when he notices a little girl next door. The little girl is in a little red wagon with little ladders hung off the side.

She is wearing a fireman's hat and has the wagon tied to a dog. The fireman says "Hey little girl. What are you doing?"

The little girl says "I'm pretending to be a fireman and this is my fire truck!"

The fireman walks over to take a closer look. "Little girl that sure is a nice fire truck!" the fireman says.

"Thanks mister", says the little girl. The fireman looks a little closer and notices the little girl has tied the dog to the wagon by it's private-parts.

"Little girl", says the fireman, "I don't want to tell you how to run your fire truck, but if you were to tie that rope around the dog's neck I think you could go faster."

The little girl says, "You're probably right mister, but then I wouldn't have a siren!"

Image source - 

Question:  What's wrong with this picture?

How the Fight Started

I’m fighting with my daughter over a man. Yes, you heard me right. My daughter and I fight over a man. Here is how the fight started.

Sometime during the middle of October, my 4 year old grandson and I sat playing a game on his Kindle Fire Tablet. He leaned into me, snuggled closely and asked, “MiMi, am I Mommy’s baby?”

With my most serious face and a long passionate tone, I answered him, “Nooooo, you’re not Mommy’s baby. You’re MiMi’s baby.” He snuggled even closer, wrapped his little arms around my neck and squeezed. “I wuv you, MiMi.”

“I love you too, baby boy.” I answered him. He repeated this action and conversation several times. Each time I was rewarded with a great big hug and deliciously sweet kiss. This went on for weeks, off and on.

One day his mommy passed near where he and I sat while this exchange was going on. He asked his mommy, “Mommy, am I MiMi’s baby?”

His mommy did as I had done initially as she had witnessed this scene many times. She replied, “Noooooo, you’re not MiMi’s baby. You’re mine.” His face broke out in the most priceless grin you ever saw.  He looked at me and asked me again.

There we were his mommy and me. He had us going back and forth as to whose baby he was and was not. That’s our lil’ man.

 He loved every minute of it. He was as happy as a, “hog-in- slop” at the back and forth between my daughter and me about whose baby he was.

After a few weeks, she and I determined that he is already getting a joyful kick out of two women fighting over him even at this young age.

Go figure!