Have you heard any good jokes lately? Tell us all about it in the comments section. We'd love to hear it! I need a good laugh to end my weekend. What about you?
Ok, I have my snack. I'm READY!
A guy goes in for a
job interview and sits down with the boss.
The boss asks him, "What do you think is your worst
quality?"
The man says, “I’m probably too honest.”
The boss says, “That’s not a bad thing, I think being honest
is a good quality.”
The man replies, “I don’t care about what you think!”
____________ ____________ ____________
To
steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
I’m
great at multitasking. I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all
at once.
Artificial
intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
If
you can stay calm while all around you is chaos, then you probably haven’t
completely understood the situation.
A
positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough
people to make it worth the effort.
____________ ____________ ____________
An old lady walked into
a pet store, found a parrot and asked the owner if she could buy it. The
owner said, “Heck no! That parrot has a bad mouth! Trust me – you do not want
that parrot!”
She said, “I can teach
it good manners.”
But, when she got home
the parrot said a bad word, so she put it in the freezer for 10 seconds.
She took it out and
said, “Did you learn your lesson?” It said another bad word so she put it back
in for 30 seconds. She took it out and asked if it learned its lesson
yet.
The parrot said “Brr…
Yes I learned my lesson, but, what did the chicken do?”
Two young boys walked into a pharmacy, picked out a box of tampons, and proceeded to the checkout counter
ReplyDeleteThe man at the counter asked the older boy, "Son, how old are you?"
"Eight" the boy replied.
The man continued, "Do you know what these are used for?"
The boy replied, "Not exactly, but they aren't for me. They're for him... He's my brother. He's four. We saw on TV that if you use these, you will be able to swim and ride a bike. Right now, he can't do either"
hahaha that last one
ReplyDeleteThese are really funny! I love the one about the parrot! Have a great week and stay safe!
ReplyDeletehehe...lol...so funny....thank you for sharing
ReplyDelete# No, I have no joke recently
Since you mentioned parrots, here's my favorite parrot joke:
ReplyDeletePlumber knocks on the door but the only one home is a parrot. He calls out, "Who is it?" The plumber responds, "The plumber." But nobody answers the door so the plumber knocks again. "Who is it?" the parrot repeats. "The plumber!" the exasperated man calls back. Still, the door remains shut, so the plumber angrily bangs on the door. "Who is it?" the parrot calls. "THE PLUMBER," the man yells, then falls dead of a heart attack from the excitement and exasperation. Later, the lady of the house returns home, sees the man's body and cries out, "Oh my god, who is it?" Comes the voice of the parrot from inside the house, "The plumber."