Saturday, April 13, 2019

Saturday Night Humor

Kids Say the Darndest Things!

Image source unknown

When questioned, elementary school children wrote the following statements about the Bible. The statements have not been edited. Incorrect spelling has been left in.

1. In the first book of the Bible, Guinessis, God got tired of creating the world, so he took the sabbath off.

2. Adam and Eve were created from an apple tree. Noah's wife was Joan of Ark. Noah built and ark and the animals came on in pears.

Source unknown

3. Lots wife was a pillar of salt during the day, but a ball of fire during the night.

4. The Jews were a proud people and throughout history they had trouble with unsympathetic genitals.

5. Sampson was a strongman who let himself be led astray by a Jezebel like Delilah.

6. Sampson slayed the Philistines with the axe of the apostles.

7. Moses led the Jews to the Red Sea where they were made unleavened bread which is bread without any ingredients.

8. The Egyptians were all drowned in the dessert. Afterwards, Moses went up to Mount Cyanide to get the Ten Commandments.

9. The first commandment was when Eve told Adam to eat the apple.

10. The seventh commandment is thou shalt not admit adultery. 


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What are your thoughts on kids humor and the bible? Have you noticed that kids are extremely funny? Let us hear from you in the comments section below. We'd love to hear from you. 


15 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Thank you, Christine. I’m glad you stopped in to read. I appreciate the comment. That is so nice of you.

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  2. wow...kids know about adultery in the seventh commandment ....(I am smiling).
    Have a great weekend

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    1. Hey there, Tanza. I’m happy you came over to read here. I appreciate the nice comment. That is so thoughtful of you. Thank you.

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  3. OMG - these are so adorable and funny! You never know what a young child will say to get us to smile and put on our thinking caps. Hugs...RO

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    1. Yes, yes, yes RO, kids certainly do say things to make us to smile and put on our thinking caps. They constantly amaze me with their thoughts and sayings.

      It's good to see your smiling face. Thank you for taking time to come by to read. Also thank you for taking time to comment. I really appreciate that.

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  4. I like these interpretations of the Bible better than some of the official ones. It's not just kids, though. I read about a survey once where one of the questions was who Joan of Arc was, and something like 10% of people thought she was Noah's wife.

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    1. Thank you for visiting and reading, and especially for commenting on my post. I’m happy you stopped by. That’s so kind of you. Your visit and comment means a lot.

      You're right, and I agree with you. These kids' interpretations of the Bible are better than some of the official ones.

      Wishing you all the best!

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  5. I was thrilled that you stopped by to9 visit, and think I neglected to mention that. Then I mistakenly think I deleted your post!!!! I'm so sorry, but I started doing something else, and my multi-tasking woefully failed. I love your blog too, and hope you come to visit again. Hugs...RO

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    1. No problem RO. I understand about the deletion. It happens to me too. I definitely can NOT multi-task. That's a tragedy in progress.

      Thank you for liking the blog. I look forward to seeing you again soon.

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  6. Replies
    1. Hey Kathy. Thanks for stopping by here. I really appreciate your taking time to comment.

      I hope you have a Great Week!

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  7. Don't kids say the most amazing things :)

    All the best Jan

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    1. Yes you're right, Jan. Kids DO say the most amazing things. They keep you "shaking your head".

      Thank you for stopping by to read and for leaving the lovely comment. I appreciate that a lot.

      Wishing you all the best!

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I'm so glad you came by. PLEASE, let me know you were here and leave a comment.

Have a wonderful wonderful day!