At the Starting Gate
Ramblings & Escapades of a Late Bloomer
Friday, March 8, 2024
Friday Feelings
Friday, February 23, 2024
OLD but True. . . and funny!
You Know You're Living in 2024 when...
1. You
accidentally enter your password on the microwave.
2. You haven't played Solitaire with
real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 4.
4. You have to LOOK through your phone
for YOUR OWN phone number because you don’t know it “by heart”!
5. You e-mail the person who works at
the desk next to you.
6. You text good morning/good night to
loved ones instead of calling them on the phone to talk.
7. Your reason for NOT staying in touch with friends and family is that they
don't have e-mail addresses or cell phones (for texting).
8. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is
home to help you carry in the groceries.
9. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen.
10. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the first
20 or 30 (or 50) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn
around to go and get it.
11. You get up in the morning and go online before getting your coffee.
11. You call on the phone from your
room for someone to bring you a bottle of water from the kitchen.
11. You carry your cell phone around
in your pocket all day long . . . to have if you need it.
11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. :)
12 You're reading this and you’re nodding and laughing.
13. Even worse, you know exactly who you are going to share this message with.
14. You are too busy to notice there are 4 #11(s) on this list.
15. You actually scrolled back up to check how many #11(s) are on this list.
16. You walk around looking for your cell phone only to realize you're talking on it.
17. You point your cell phone at the tv to change channels.
AND NOW YOU ARE LAUGHING-OUT-LOUD . . . by yourself.
Happy Friday Night, dear friends!
Monday, January 22, 2024
A Chuckle to End Your Day
~ ~ Stupid Short Jokes ~ ~
Two
Muffins were baking in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says,
"Holy
S-h*** it's hot in here!" The other muffin says, "Holy S-h***... A
talking muffin! 😕
~ ~ ~
"A man
entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope
that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
~ ~ ~
A man: "Waiter!
This coffee tastes like mud."
Waiter: "Yes
sir, it's fresh ground."
~ ~ ~
Spaghetti
A
wealthy man was having an affair with an Italian woman for several years. One
night, during one of their rendezvous, she confided in him that she was
pregnant.
Not
wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he paid her a large sum of
money if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child. If she stayed in
Italy to raise the child, he would also provide child support until the child
turned 18.
She
agreed, but asked how he would know when the baby was born. To keep it
discrete, he told her to simply mail him a post card and write
"Spaghetti" on the back. He would then arrange for child support
payments to begin.
One day,
about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife.
"Honey,"
she said, "you received a very strange post card today."
"Oh,
just give it to me and I'll explain it," he said.
The wife
obeyed, and watched as her husband read the card, turned white, and fainted.
On the
card was written: "Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti. Two with meatballs,
one without." 🤯
~ ~ ~
Tuesday, January 16, 2024
Another Year of Blessings
~ Happy Birthday Sweet Daughter! ~
You Are My Sunshine!
On this
day somewhere back in time
God smiled on me and PaPa ~dellgirl~.
He said, "I'm sending you some sunshine,
a whole lot of joy, and a treasure beyond compare!
Take care of her, love her, and above all
enjoy her. But remember this, she is mine."
With that in mind we welcomed
the world's #1 daughter, our one and only -
DuAnne aka Jordyn.
I love you, my sunshine. You light up my life!
You made my life richer and more
joyful than I could ever imagine.
Having you as my daughter is truly a
precious gift from God.
Thank you, sweet daughter, for being such an
inspiration in my life!
I hope your day was as special and wonderful as
you are.
I wish you love, peace, happiness, and
God's Goodness & Mercy forever and ever!
Happy Birthday
Love-of-my-Life!
Thursday, January 4, 2024
Happy New Year – To You Blog Friends
My Warmest Wishes for You, Friends!
May your 2024 be filled with as much love as your heart can
stand.
I wish you joy beyond your wildest imagination along with
endless precious family moments together.
I wish that good health be constant throughout the year, and
that prosperity finds its way to you and be ever present in every moment of
your life.
I wish you a year filled with positivity, growth, and
countless reasons to smile. Wishing you a wonderful year ahead!
Friday, December 29, 2023
What's Up?
What do you see up in the sky?
I see something up there. Do you?
Hi and Hello to everyone. What are you up to these days? Are your days fun and exciting or routine and mundane? Tell us please, we’d love to hear about it. What have I been up to? Same-o, same-o. I’ll leave that up to your imagination. In the meantime, let’s catch up on UP.
We seem to be pretty mixed UP about UP! To be knowledgeable about the proper uses of UP look the word UP in the dictionary. In a desk-sized dictionary, it takes UP almost 1/4th of the page and can add UP to about thirty definitions.
If you are UP to it, you might try building UP a list of the many ways UP is used.
It will take UP a lot of your time, but if you don't give UP, you may wind UP with a hundred or more.
When it threatens to rain, we say it is clouding up. When the sun comes out we say it is clearing up.
When it rains, it wets the earth and often messes things up. When it doesn't rain for awhile things dry up.
Brenda picked up her plate from the table and went outside to eat on the patio.
You'd better go wash up, it’s time to eat dinner.
I woke up earlier than usual this morning.
Now that I’m old(er), walking up the stairs is not as easy as it used to be.
Tuesday, December 19, 2023
Tis The Season
For starters, I can relieve a lot of my stress by dumping limiting beliefs. Limiting beliefs are those things I believe about myself that place limitations on my abilities.
Question: Is it possible to relieve stress?
Answer: Yes. But, before I go on if your level of stress is serious, consult your physician. But, if you think you can take charge of your stress, here are a few things that can help.
- Learn to have a
sense of humor
- Try yoga: no legs behind the neck here
though
- Aroma therapy works wonders
- Exercise for 30 minutes
- Take a walk in the fresh air
-Listen
to some relaxing music
- Try dance and creative movement
- Eat Chocolate, eat it in moderation or open a candy bar
and just smell it
- Relaxation & deep breathing exercises
provide immediate relief
- Take a six minute vacation
(let your mind wander freely)
- Communicate: talking with friends, family, a counselor, or a
member of the clergy about your
feelings is a healthy way to relieve stress
- Set more realistic goals: for yourself and
others (those close to you)
- Develop a hobby: writing, blogging, fishing, knitting, photography, woodworking, anything.
Do something fun with your hands
Find your inner peace - - learn how to relieve your stress by finding what works best for you.
Let us know your favorite ways to de-stress in the comments section
Monday, December 11, 2023
Really Now! . . . Christmas Already?!
Christmas Decorating Tips
Here we are, December 11th already, and Christmas is just around the corner. I’m NOT ready! Are you? Trying to get ready and get myself in the mood, I started thinking about where to start searching for my Christmas decorations. Ummm . . . where in the middle of all this unpacked stuff, could they possibly be?!
Christmas Decorating Tips
1. Choose simple Christmas centerpieces. They look great despite the fact they are plain. A few candles and some red bows will transform them into instantly elegant pieces.
2. A fast and super- easy way to decorate and add a warm holiday touch is to use a small pre-lit Christmas tree that comes already decorated. Put one in the kitchen and one in the bathroom.
3. Arrange your Christmas figurines and candles in groups for a stunning effect. Groups of 3 or 5 will make your mantel more interesting and appealing.
5. Don’t limit your decorations to your Christmas tree. Use some ornaments and bows to decorate other large house plants.
Hopefully, these few tips will get your inspiration juices flowing and get you in the mood for decorating your home for Christmas.
Monday, December 4, 2023
Monday Night Humor
Computer Problems
I was having trouble with my computer. So, I
called Richard, the 11-year-old next door whose bedroom looks like a Mission
Control Station and asked him to come over. Richard clicked a couple of buttons
and solved the problem.
As he was walking away, I called after him, 'So, what was wrong? He replied, 'It was an ID ten T error.'
I didn't want to appear stupid, but nonetheless I inquired, 'An, ID ten T error? What's that? In case I need to fix it again.'
Richard grinned.... 'Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?'
'No,' I replied. 'Write it down,' he said, 'and I think you'll figure it out.'
So I wrote down: I D 1 0 T ...
I used to like that little farrt.............
Image Source Unknown
Didja gitta good laff OR NOT?!Tuesday, November 28, 2023
Stealing Time
Hello
Yes!
I'm stealing time - to post. There are several things, important things I should be doing but, I miss y’all.
Hi, Hey, and Hello to you . . . one and ALL!
I really do miss you all when I’m away (from blogging).
So, that's why I'm stealing this time to post this simple hello. I just had to check-in long enough to say, "Hi" to all.
Thankfully, I got a few things done while away from blogging
though. I decluttered a couple of drawers and cabinets in the kitchen and in my bathroom.
I threw away some items around the house that were no longer useful or needed.
AND, OH . . . there’s more, but I’ll stop here. I’m getting tired all over again just writing it all down.
That done, another “something-to-do” popped up. It was important and needed immediate attention. Oh well . . .
What are you up to these days? How was your Thanksgiving? Mine was NICE, quiet, and Blessed! Thank God for that!